The ultimate self-love treats to gift yourself with this Singles Day
Who needs supermarket carnations from a fuckboy/girl/them when you can stock up on your true heart's desire...
words Megan Wallace
Couples! They're everywhere! Whether it's taking up seats on the overground or blocking the pavement walking their whippets around Stoke Newington, there's no escaping them. And, yes, love is beautiful, finding someone (or multiple people, my poly friends) you want to share your life with is sacred - we know. But also, have you noticed that when you're in a relationship you're always getting presents? Like, constant gifts, especially as you rise up that relationship escalator: anniversary gifts from your partner, engagement gifts from close pals, wedding gifts from all your distant relatives. What about us single folk? Who's lavishing us with prezzies for being our fabulously, self-partnered selves?
Well, as it turns out, while Valentine's Day is a whole holiday celebrating relationships with a flurry of Moonpig cards and carnations (not chic) there is actually a day devoted to the single life (chic)! Yes, the imaginatively titled "Singles Day" is a tradition starting in China which is all about hyping up everyone who is riding solo through cuffing season. It's often marked with discounts to various shops and retailers, helping the consciously uncoupled lavish themselves with the gifts of their heart's desire.
Here at woo, you can enjoy 10% off with the code feelgoodhere (we won't check if you're actually single, we promise) to ring in the holiday. Pro tip: load up your basket and send it to all your coupled friends. If you bought them a Le Creuset set for their wedding, they can definitely shell out for a vibrator to celebrate your marriage to the one person that matters: yourself.
This is as luxury a lube as they come. Not only is it organic and made with moisturising aloe, it's pH-balanced and totally free from glycerin and parabens. All that means that you won't be putting any nasty chemicals on your private parts - essential! It's water-based, which means you can use it safely with all sex toys and latex condoms so it'll keep you safe as well as making things extra fun and slippery. The bottle's design is pretty chic too...
This is officially the most subtle sex toy we have ever seen: honestly it looks just like a lipstick? Pack it in your work bag or your hand luggage and no-one will be none the wiser - a major win! It's not just us that loves it - it won "Best Discreet Vibrator" at Cosmopolitan UK's Sex Toy Awards this year.
Got commitment issues? Get a plant! Not only is it way less hassle than a significant other (no tricky in-laws to satisfy), you don't have to deal with pricy vet bills. This Monstera is super easy to care for, grows quickly and comes in a sleek teal pot. May you two be very happy together...
GOOD VIBES ONLY
Cock rings are designed to up the endurance factor when it comes to erections: making them harder and last longer. While this doesn't work for everyone (we're all different) you'll always be onto a winner when it comes to a vibrating ring. The vibes send tingly sensations up the shaft for extra pleasure so that, if you're creative, this toy can be as enjoyable for partnered sex as it is for a luxury wank.
Your Hinge prospects keeping you up at night? Make sure nothing comes between you and those Zs with these clinically proven sleep supplements that help you hit the hay faster, stay in the Land of Nod longer and wake up fresher. These little capsules are packed full of ingredients like ashwagandha, magnesium and chamomile flower to help you chill out and get the rest you deserve. Dreamy.
If you're single, make sure to invest in some nice bedware - we beg. No one wants to sleep on navy sheets and a single crusty pillow and that should include you, too. Start off with this warm af wool blanket to help you wrap up tight and discovers the joys of natural fibres against the skin. Next up: a quality duvet cover, because you're worth it...
SUCK IT UP
If you have a clit, you're gonna want to try this. Suction toys basically simulate oral sex by sending pressure waves across the vulva except this time you don't have to worry about anyone's subpar technique. You're welcome.
Candles: they're not just for setting the mood, they're also for chilling the f out whenever you've got a bit of down time. Set a warm glow in your room or living area with this multicoloured, sculpted work of wax beauty. Let there be light!
Ah, butt plugs, the ultimate gender neutral sex toy. If you're curious about anal play but feel too nervous about trying out with a hookup then you might want to give this So Divine number a try. Thanks to its flared base, you don't have to worry anything going missing, and it's got some lovely, rumbly vibrations for you to enjoy. Just don't forget the lube...
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