Open up conversations about sex

"Ultimately we need to talk to teenagers about sex and porn a lot more, obviously in age-appropriate ways. There are many examples of good practice across Europe, where teenagers are a lot more familiar with sexuality and sex media, and more open to discuss it with parents and educators. There is a particular aspect of English culture, however, that I think is at the cause of many of the fears we project onto pornography, and that is the particular way in which white British culture fears sexuality and the body. Were that fear not in place, we would be able to help teenagers develop media literacy and sexual literacy skills through proper conversations and exchanges, to understand – like they do of other media – that porn is not sex and sex is not porn."

Dr João Florêncio, lecturer at the University of Exeter and author of Bareback Porn, Porous Masculinities, Queer Future

Improve sex education: for parents as well as young people

"Comprehensive sex education (in schools) is essential to create an understanding that porn is entertainment and not education. Ultimately, sex education needs to start young and in an age-appropriate manner while similar education for the parents is also essential. Media literacy skills are also needed, to help young people learn how to read and understand the research around porn."

Dr Lori Beth Bisbey, psychologist and intimacy and sex coach

Put more emphasis on ethical consumption

"Teaching people to be questioning and critical of how porn is (created) behind the scenes, not just how it's advertised is so important. You can look into the performers or the companies that are creating the content that you watch and ask questions about how they make work and see if their values align with yours. How something looks or how it's advertised has no real bearing on whether the performers had a good time on set.

Follow the social media of your favourite performers and look at who they really love to shoot for, who they're shouting out a lot. Buying or watching content directly from performers also means they're more in control of how it's being sold and what they want to show. Listen to what sex workers say they need to feel safer and more supported at work.

Something I would love to see in a sex literacy session would be going through the process of what you have to do to shoot porn – the communication, testing, consent, equipment, on-set practices and difficulties – so people realise the work and the complexity that goes into creating something most people just see as disposable."

Vex Ashley, porn performer and director and co-founder of Four Chambers

Sex toy of the month 🍆 🍆

One thing about us? We know sex toys: we've even got a whole online store full of 'em. Here, we give you a round-up of our favourite piece of sex tech of the month.

Real sex stories 🍑

Letting us into the intimate details of a week in their sex life is a celibate 22-year-old living with herpes. Here's a little sneak peek below...

I break the news to my friends that it’s been almost a year since I last had sex. One of them jokes we should go for a celebratory, or at least commemorative, drink. Mostly it prompts a slew of disbelieving comments (they’re all either coupled up or have an unfathomable amount of sex). “If you wanted to have sex by now, you would’ve,” says one friend. “All it takes it five minutes and a bit of motivation.”

I’m not sure whether to be inspired by this or offended. I understand the sentiment, but I think men often forget it’s not as simple for some women as being horny and having five minutes available. Having herpes means that, as well as being horny (a rare occurrence for me nowadays), I have to be slightly more selective about who I sleep with.

It has to be someone I think won’t shame me when I tell them I have herpes and will take time to make me feel comfortable. I’ve also finally reached a place where I’ve raised the bar of my standards, after years of pleading by my friends that I deserve a lot better, so I’m trying to not just go for anyone who’s into me.

Read the full entry in our monthly anonymous sex diary, as our anonymous writer navigates their one year celibacy anniversary and tries to overcome a fear of dating women.

The science of sex 🧠

So... you know how earlier we mentioned that porn shouldn't be used as your primary source of sex education? This is still true, but it can help you spice things up in the bedroom if you see it as a source of inspiration, ideas and fantasy rather than a reflection of real life. As it turns out, this is particularly true when it comes to bespoke or subscription material - at least according to a recent study published in the Sexuality and Culture journal.

The study analysed the results of an online survey completed by 425 adult OnlyFans users, with participants reporting that they had learned new things in terms of sexual practices, sexual preferences, relationships, and sexual health. This knowledge translated to action for many of those surveyed, with 41% saying that they had tried new activities, such as playing with sex toys, after having engaged with OnlyFans content.

Study author Marie Lippmann, an associate professor of psychology at California State University in Chico, explained that the research was created in response to the unequal levels of sex education across the US and seeks to assess how sites like OnlyFans plug the resulting knowledge gap. "Formal sexuality education curriculum varies widely throughout the United States, and individuals may seek out additional information about sex and sexuality from informal media sources and online platforms," she told Pyspost. "We were interested in understanding learning on OnlyFans, given that it is such a widely used and novel platform."