Best quiet sex toys for paper thin walls
So you and your vibrator can have a private moment, without any flatmates overhearing
words Megan Wallace
If you’re anything like us, you’re a fan of sex toys. I mean, how could you not be? When it comes to vibrators there are so many amazing devices to try: from rabbits to suction toys. And there’s no denying that these little bundles of (silicone) joy can bring a lot of happiness, enjoyment and orgasms into your life. But there's one downside you’ve got to be aware of, even when it comes to some of the best sex toys on the market.
Your wand vibrator’s frenetic whirring can be slightly off-putting when you’re getting into the groove, but there’s also the fact that it’s less than ideal if you happen to live with flatmates (or, worse still, parents) in a home with paper-thin walls. Not only will they know when, exactly, you’re enjoying some solo time, they might also find their own sleep/morning routine/peace of mind by what sounds like a pocket-sized pneumatic drill.
So, if you don’t have the luxury of living on your own, it can be helpful to invest in a more discreet-sounding vibrator. And while in the past, the phrase “quiet sex toy” was an oxymoron, there are plenty of vibrator options nowadays that dial down the sound without compromising on horse power. Plenty of toys now have a “whisper quiet” function (look out for this when you’re shopping - we’d highly recommend!) to help minimise embarrassing moments. There are also lots of vibes which are more petite, so have smaller motors, and therefore just don’t make as much racket.
A word to the wise, if you're looking for a truly silent vibrator, you should check out the max noise level listed in the toy's specifications. As a quick crash course, 25 decibels or lower is practically noiseless, whereas anywhere in the 40 decibel mark is like a quiet neighbourhood at night, and toys which reach decibels of 50 give off volumes similar to the hum of a refrigerator.
Keep it quiet
If you fancy giving bum stuff a try, there's no need to be afraid: just lube up, take a deep breath and go. This silicone butt plug is a great place to start if you fancy experimenting with anal play and, given that it doesn't have any vibrations, it's completely and utterl silent. Enjoy!
Double the action, twice the fun
This rabbit vibrator from Vush offers targeted internal and external stimulation for a dreamy blended orgasm and boasts a huge 40 mix and match settings for a highly customised experience. This toy comes in at around 50 decibels, meaning it's similar to the hum of a refrigerator: not ideal for the thinnest of walls so one you'll want to position under the sheets, so that the sound is muffled.
Drop the pressure
Suction toys mimic the feeling of a tongue on your clit and vulva so, yeah, they're pretty great. This one is from the the luxury brand LELO, and is made from super soft silicone. This toy is one of the brand's quieter suction toys and is around the 50 decibel level.
This ingenious So Divine vibrator is designed to look just like a lipstick, so no-one will be any the wiser as to its true function. Given that it's a smaller vibe it's also on the quieter side it's an all-round winner.
Know what we were saying about trying anal play? For total beginners, you might want to start with a smaller toy such as this So Divine butt plug. Don't forget some water-based lube.
Made from medical grade silicone, this precision point bullet vibrator boasts an impressive ten vibration settings so you've got plenty to play with.
This aptly named Afternoon Delight vibe from So Divine has three speeds and seven vibrating patterns (so lots to choose from) as well as a handy tapered tip for targeted stimulation.
Finger vibrators loop over your finger (yep, the clue is in the name) and work similarly to a bullet vibrator, giving you the same buzzy external stimulation but with the added bonus of being slightly easier to position and manoeuvre. This single-speed toy is super discreet and a great beginner's toy.
This bullet is made from super silky silicone and has three different speeds to play with, as well as being rechargeable and fully waterproof. Perfect if you want to level up your bath or shower time.
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